Posts

2018 vs 2020

yeah...i'm in love. but with whom?? with the old me .👻 that old me who's  still so innocent,yet so kind still obedient,yet so tough still sleeping,yet listening. hey me from a draft two,three years ago.. you thought that you miss the old you that was better than what you are now..but the truth is, the painful truth is, you were always a dissapointment. there was never an 'innocent you' that was kind. there was never an obedient you that was tough there was never a sleeping you that was listening. you were just oblivious of who you actually are. i'm sorry but this,,is just part of the truth my dear.

some feelings are just shit.

hey sup..long time no see;) ya know, I freakin hate myself.for being stupid,soo fukin easy as a girl im raised to be.why must i be so kind to people?so friendly?to just end up catching fake feelings for someone that treated me 'soo' very specially, which was what i thought. ughh damn i'm so stupid.for even starting to let these creature known as boys . why must get used to them. why must it be so much more comfortable with them? I have been too easy,that now I'm the one hurting.i'm the one to blame,for being in the conflict,for falling?,for being so foolish and just realising too late, that nothing good ever comes out of these feelings.not now.not yet. but whats the point regretting now huh?your names been disgraced.your title? you friendships,the trust.All them messed up.yet all you can do now..is laugh about it even though it still hurts you.you thought what you had was special,but just so you know..you're just a show and tell for him to his friends. f